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17 November 2002
From: Melanie
Q: I respect your talent as an actor. Your qualifications as a social
commentator are another story. I do feel the need to pointedly disagree
with you on the counsel you gave
the 14 year old Christian. Since you are no more Christian than I am
gay, your remark about the kid being able to stop being Catholic and still
be himself was made in complete ignorance of what it means to be
Christian. If I stopped being Christian, I wouldn't be me anymore. Being a
Christian is more than just a belief it is an entire way, a reason for
being, even, permeating every facet of life to one extent or another.
Being gay is no excuse for not treating other people with the same respect
and consideration for their sensibilities you would expect them to give
you, especially impressionable 14 year olds who can do you no harm.
A: I think the basic distinction holds between what is inborn and
what is not, and that it is unreasonable to expect a gay man to desist
from being gay. You were not born with your faith, although I would quite
appreciate that having discovered it, you might feel re-born. Incidentally
your view numerically didn¹t register against the vast majority from whom
I have selected the following representatives.
Q: When I was a teenager, I was also sort of homophobic - but then I
read the comics of a (here, in Germany, well-known) gay artist (Ralf
Koenig ) and saw, that they are people like any other - boring, exciting,
hateful, loving, creative, dull. I am still a Roman Catholic and want to
assure you, that statements like the one of the 14-years old child are not
representative of my religion. Christ is Love, not Hate - but in
condemning gay people as " wrong ", you let the devil into your heart. I
start to sound like a preacher, so I better stop now.
A: Thank you for introducing me to Ralf Koenig his official
site is terrific.
Q: I was recently horrified to read an attack on you and your sexuality
in your e-post by a 14 year old. I must say that being a 15 year old gay
teen, far from being disappointed by your sexuality I am amazed by your
resiliance and the way you have acted as an inspiration to so many
including me. On section 28 I heartily agree, although I feel that the law
itself does little to affect the way I live and most pupils and staff
discuss and promote homosexuality most freely. But I do agree that the law
should be removed on grounds of principle. I am more than a little bit
disappointed that you did not speak out more in favour of the adoption
bill In Britain that would allow gay couples to adopt children. Although I
give you the benefit of the doubt and put this down to your busy acting
career. I am a member of the conservative party and realise that the right
wing is occasionally critical of homosexuality and I disagree wholly with
Iain Duncan Smith putting a three line whip on the adoption issue. Lastly,
I wish you would return to Britain to do some more acting work here.
A: The adoption bill managed without me! Sorry your leader
decided to oppose it but then he is only following the example of all his
recent predecessors. On the issue I care most about the Tory party's
policies are third-rate. I hope you can be some influence and get them
improved.
If you do that, I'll think about acting in London again soon.
From: Dave
Q: Unfortunately, for many people, faith, in the religious sense, is a
convenient excuse for bigotry. Bigotry of any kind only serves to hurt. No
good comes of it. As far as acting goes, Frank Oz is not REALLY a small
green Jedi master. Christopher Lee is not REALLY a blood sucking vampire.
Men have played women (hello Shakespeare), women have played men,
heterosexual have played homosexual and vice versa. All that matters is
the quality of the acting in the portrayal of the character.
A: My sentiments entirely.
From: Ned Kelly
Q: I admire you for being "OUT" and I adore you for being "OUTSPOKEN".
I've been a fan of yours for many years, ever since I attended a
performance of Richard III in St. Paul, MN around ten years ago, at age
15. Over these last ten years, your career has grown tremendously, with
mainstream roles like Magneto and Gandalf exposing you to a vast audience
who wouldn't have been interested in your stage work or your smaller scale
films such as Gods & Monsters. You could have tried to play-down your
sexuality, refused to discuss it with the media, and make yourself as
box-office friendly as possible. Instead, you have continued to be active
in the gay community and continued to speak openly about the issue. Not
many celebrities would use space on their own fan site to print what is
essentially hate mail directed at themselves, but you have done so
unflinchingly and used it as another opportunity to confront bigotry and
homophobia and to let these people know that you aren't ashamed of who you
are! I don't know if you have received a great deal of gay bashing email
and so forth, but I just wanted to voice my support and remind you that
you have fans, both gay and straight, who love your work as an actor and
admire you greatly as a person. PS: Oh, and keep ripping out that page in
Leviticus. In fact, tear out everything except for the sermons where Jesus
teaches about compassion, forgiveness, non-violence, and charity...
A: No, I get very very little anti-gay e-mail. Having posted it,
there has been a flood of friendly mail from straights and gays who
evidently care. You included. Thank you.
Q: I read your post on bits and bobs about
tearing the pages out of the Bible.
I think it is the same thing as those who would burn Mark Twain because of
his descriptions of the slaves. Where would Tolkien's books be if those
who believe his books were against Christianity? The list of authors goes
on and on. My advice to anyone who does not like what an author has to say
is invoke your right to not look at the book. Leave it on the shelf...or
in the drawer.
A: Of course you are right but as there are many people who base
their loathing of gay people on the verses I excise and as they are not
the last thing I want to be reminded of as I try and sleep, I commit the
offence.
Q: Don't worry this is not an abusive letter. I am a Christian and
though I'm not gay I do not like the phrase in Leviticus, one of the few
in the bible I have difficulty agreeing with. I can't help but feel it was
written by someone who at the time was living in a culture that was
intolerant of such things (not that these times are always that tolerant)
and let it affect what he wrote.
A: Yes, and as a historical document it is of interest. As a law
to be obeyed in another place and another time it is unhelpful.
From: Sarah
Q: I was disgusted by the comment concerning tearing pages out of the
Bible. I was not disgusted by the fact that you do this, but rather the
cruel and hurtful words that were directed at you. While I am a Christian,
I do agree with you on this particular matter. Gay or straight, Christian
or atheist, I think everyone could stand to learn a little tolerance. And
I think if removing intolerant passages from the Bible helps you sleep
better, then more power to you...after all, the Bible was not written by
God himself. It is God's word, interpreted by Man, and as we all know, Man
is an imperfect being. Perhaps Christians should learn to love they
neighbor as thyself, no matter whom he or she happens to love. Because
that after all is what makes humanity great- love. P.S. I am a huge fan,
and I think that you are every bit as much of an inspiration to the
heterosexual community as you are to the gay community.
A: Thank you for your support and for your definition of the
Bible as God's word interpreted by Man, imperfect man. I also think of the
Bible as great literature rather than great history; great imagination
rather than reliable witness. Whatever, it is not as a law book that I
respect the Bible.
Q: I teach in an American School outside of London. To grow up gay is
to grow up with a deep feeling of being different, disenfranchised and
isolated, never really feeling a part of the life and daily things most
young men take for granted. Particularly in American society, to grow up
gay is to grow up feeling secretly ashamed and worried, worthless and
unworthy, always on guard and mindful of the real possibilities of
exposure, attack, and possibly even death. The feelings of entitlement and
belonging, so taken for granted by my friends, were feelings I never
experienced as I grew up. Such is the rite of passage for so many gay men
and women. Books were the main source of comfort, escape, and ultimately,
strength in those days, and the Lord of the Rings was a benchmark and
major influence. The nobility of the themes seared themselves into my
young heart: redemption, perseverance in the face of impossible odds, the
worthiness of sacrifice for the good of others, love and fidelity. They
are all there, set in the complex mythical invention. Now in my middle
age, I am overjoyed to see the books given the faithful, lavish and
artistic treatment they are getting in the Jackson films, and that in
itself would be deeply satisfying; what has taken it all to a much higher
level for me is what you have brought to the films, and to our lives. How
many (other) middle-aged, half-in-the-closet, still-fearful gay teachers
have you helped? For last week, I filed a formal complaint against another
teacher who is harassing a gay student. I would not have the balls to do
this a year ago. And what did I say to myself, smiling, as I handed in the
complaint?
"You shall not pass!"Â
A: One of the many joyous effects of coming out is to make
contact with other gay people, most of whom I shall never meet. Making
connections with strangers who confide their stories, like you and others
do in these E-posts, confirms that there is such a thing as a gay
community.
I hope your stand helped the gay student, whom I suppose you
could befriend. Gandalf's words indeed. (Actually not Gandalf's or even
Tolkien's my misreading of the correct command "You cannot pass!").
Just so long as there isn't some fiery creature lurking with a whip
outside the teachers' common-room.
Q: Hmmmmm... Leviticus 18:22 you say? Can't wait for my next trip(s)
out of town! Those suckers are outta there! With great admiration - Bonnie
McMillian, Houston, TX
A: Let's ride sister Clyde McKellen, Victoria BC
From: Mike
A: I just read the letter from the 14 year old catholic girl. I'm gay
myself have been all my 20 years and I just wanted to thank you for
providing a cool-headed response to this young girl's question. Often when
I'm confronted with something like this I get so angry I can't make a
single good point and I usually just walk off in a huff rather than saying
anything... though it's doubtful perhaps the things you said made this
young girl review her beliefs and maybe show her that there's more than
one side to every story.
A: Debating can be learnt. You should have a few good phrases
ready for emergencies.
From: Nick Corporon
Q: I'm a gay college student and have forever had trouble dealing with
The Bible's espousal on homosexuality. I recently took a literature class
in which a wise professor gave us an interesting interpretation on
homosexuality in The Bible. According to him, verses like Leviticus 18:22,
refer not to homosexuality, but to instances of men having sex AS IF THEY
WERE WOMEN - much like prison sex, in which men have sex with other men
out of necessity, but not as homosexuals, gays like you and I. This notion
helps me to look at The Bible with a stronger stomach. This is just an
interpretation and I hope that it might help some.
A: Yes and no. Your explanation is still predicated on the notion
that nothing in the Bible is wrong and that all its outdated parts have to
be explained and excused rather than acknowledged and regretted. I don't
mind that there are a (very) few disparaging references to homosexuality
in the Old Testament: it's just when some folks still give them credence
that I get concerned.
From: Iain MacDonald
I am a 16 year old heterosexual male from western Canada. It bothers me
that I felt it necessary to begin my letter like that. Your E-Post and the
topic of many of your interviews and conversations are about
homosexuality. You are a champion of gay rights, but considering that, you
still seem to spend an awful lot of time talking about homosexuality.
Sexuality is a part of all human beings but is not the defining factor of
our lives. So my question to you is this: Do you wish people would just
accept it, and move on? Don't you get tired of discussing it in EVERY
interview? OR do you thrive on this kind of thing? I wish that for every
time I heard you discussing sexuality I was instead learning an insight
into the life of a world class actor, or some interesting tidbit about how
you played Gandalf.
A: Point taken but like so much else on this site these
occasional clusters of "gay e-posts" (n.b. there are many more on acting
and of course on Gandalf) are in response to the mail I get.
If you read all the correspondence you will get a sense of how
important for some of us it is to keep this topic in the public arena. For
so long gay people have been encouraged to keep quiet and stay hidden in
the closet, e.g. "Don't ask, don't tell" is still official policy
regarding gays in the US military.
From: Wednesday
Q: Last week I saw a bumper sticker, "Truth over tolerance." Oh, goody,
back to the Inquisition we go. You love men; so what, so do I. Your
honesty, wisdom and forthright honesty on the Web makes me think about the
issues you address long after I've turned off the computer. Who you sleep
with is your own private concern, and I wish you only love and contentment
from such encounters. To those who carp and are horrified by such things,
up their collective fjord.
A: You put it clearly.
From: siddalrising@aol.com Siddal
Q: I just read your most recent page of e-posts. As an adult daughter
of a lesbian, and a mother myself, I applaud you dear man. Be well and
thank you for having the courage and depth of conviction to speak out
about topics that are so often publicly shunned by those in a position to
make a positive change in the status quo.
A: And you never can tell where a word or point of view will land
where it is needed. You just tell the truth as you see and hope for the
best.
From: Christine
Q: How does one become a gay rights activist and do you have to be gay
to be an activist?
A: You have started by reading this page and then asking the
question. All gay movements I have been involved with have depended on
supporters and volunteers who were not gay, although they all preferred
people to be open about their sexuality. If you have any expertise (like
your computer) you will be welcomed by your local Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgendered
organisations. Go to their meetings if they are open to the public and see
if you like what is being planned.
The net has been crucial to many advances in pro-gay legislation
by identifying the arguments and the numbers of those affected. But even
so, an individual can make a vital difference by making clear his/her
views to the local legislators who need votes. Straight people are very
effective in encouraging straight politicians to listen. Gays are often
accused of over-stating their case and running propaganda pages like this
one!
Q: I pray for the day when every gay/bisexual/transexual/straight
person can be as out and as public about their love lives as they want to
be. As a lifelong church-going Christian (who has a Masters degree in
theology) I believe God created us as we are, and rejoices in our ability
to love and give each other pleasure. As for the passage in Leviticus,
it's a historically bound command, right up there with don't wear clothes
made of two different kinds of fabric (also called an abomination). And I
think Paul was homophobic (in the true sense of suppressing his own
sexuality by attacking others). The church I attend is full of openly gay
people, as well as families with children. I'm thrilled to have my
children go to church with all sorts. They know you are gay (at least when
I remind them; it's not very important to them) and they love you and your
Gandalf.
A: Your church sounds fun. So do your kids. Tell them I say hi.
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